You know, my mom is awesome and when I talk to her about the random shit in my life, she often goes “you know, that was really NOT the case when I was your age. For us, it was different.” and that’s very true on the topic of friendship. When my mom was my age, friendship was important, so people were more likely to forgive each other and also less likely to do things that would push people away, because without friends, there was nothing to do.
Friendship prevented boredom, and that’s basically the magic of humanity – how we entertain ourselves. But we have so many things now, so many new and exciting ways to isolate ourselves so we can not be bored but not have to spend time around people. Most of the time, I’m pretty happy with that, and can go for a surprisingly long time without needing or wanting contact with other humans, which is good because making friends is hard. You know when you’re playing an RPG and you end up with a helper monkey who follows you to help you with your quest? I hate those. They make me feel bad, like I’m wasting their time while I do my other quests, and that makes me angry. STOP FOISTING FRIENDS ON ME, WOW, I PLAY THIS BECAUSE I DON’T WANT TO DEAL WITH ANYONE RIGHT NOW.
So, with video games, Netflix, Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, blogs, Youtube, TV shows, movies, the ability to order food online without having to talk to another human being (I love that one particularly) and on and on and on… we don’t really need other people in our lives anymore. All we need is an internet connection and we can be friends with people all over the world that we never have to see. We can be whoever we want on the internet, so the real friends in our real lives, they tell us what we want to hear so we’ll like them. And in some ways, that’s great, because it makes you feel good about things you never really thought you’d feel good about. But on the other hand, it kind of stunts personal growth, because when you do something shitty to another person, they never actually TELL you it was shitty. They just fade away and you continue being an asshole to the next person, with no idea why they’re not in your life anymore. Sometimes friends drift apart, and sometimes friends stop being friends because of actual reasons… and sometimes friends were never really your friends at all. Without all the tech and distractions, people used to have try to be friends with other people, and now, if you don’t bother trying, then it doesn’t matter, because Netflix will always be there for you.
So, I don’t know. I feel like, as a society, we’re getting lazy about how we interact. I think we need to remember that people won’t always be there if we take them for granted, and they really won’t be want to be there if you throw hissy fits about stupid crap. Maybe we need more honesty and less bullshit, or maybe we need to give people time and space and quite possibly a whole new dimension. I don’t know. I don’t understand people. I just want to know why some of the people in my life in the last year or so have turned out to be such unbelievable fuckwads. I’ll probably never know.
So, for my nice friends who are understanding, lovely people who would never treat people in ways they would not wish to be treated – I greatly appreciate all of you for who you are, and that you are not a fuckwit. If you need me, there are many, many ways you can reach me, because that’s the beauty of all an internet connection.