Hey, so, for my last post, I was all like “I feel like everything is terrible for no reason and I can’t deal with anything right now!” and then my birthday happened and it was AWESOME, because my friends, family and Mr. Grumpiface proved to me that they are awesome, and my life is so much better because of them. See, Mr. Grumpiface hijacked my birthday and made it original Star Trek themed, so everyone showed up in red shirts with communicator badges, my mom made me a Star Trek cake, my friend Stu gave me an amazing picture of Raphael (the Ninja Turtle) that he inked himself, my friend <name redacted> made me a Borg cube pinata, my sister bought me a book on how to speak Klingon, and Mr. Grumpiface gave me some Fables volumes I didn’t have yet, with an Original Series Star Trek Communicator and Phaser. It was very geeky and very much appreciated. 🙂 Another friend made me a dairy-free, gluten-free ganache that tasted like chocolate orgasm, and I was so happy, I haven’t had chocolate anything in a really long time.

ImageSooo, I guess what I’m trying to say is a big THANK YOU to everyone for making me feel special. I can’t even begin to tell you all how much it meant to me, and I hope to reciprocate that feeling if I can.

Onto the “your party was nearly a month ago, why are you just posting this now?” question:

I wrote this a few times and it kept coming out wrong, so I decided to simplify it as much as possible, back to the “thank you” part and the “this was awesome!” part. I didn’t mean to leave it for so long, but sometimes things happen. Or, in this case, they don’t happen; you see, I’ve been off martial arts for a month now, until my leg heals (update: it’s better now, but still sore whenever I have to use it for something.) and it’s really been screwing with me. I’m not in class after work now, so I have the whole evening to do it, so I procrastinate and then it just never gets done. You know that point where you’ve left something for so long that you can’t do it because you don’t want to remind everyone you haven’t done it? It’s like that.

We also finally made it back to the gym, and have been back on the weight training. I was supposed to get on this much, much earlier this year, because it’s the end of April now. We’re going up to the tiny, tiny town where I’m from in Northern BC, for my grandfather’s funeral. You remember how he passed away last November, the day of Mr. Grumpiface’s fitness show? We figured the roads would have cleared up enough for the drive by now, but the shitty fucking weather this year is apparently still shitty. 

ImageHopefully, we will make it up there in good time without dying. Mr. Grumpiface is driving me up and will meet my dad for the first time, accompany me to the funeral, and then we will drive back. Then, the following weekend, we will be driving up to Kamloops for his martial arts tournament. Someone (who has never seen me in class) asked if I was competing, and I kind of laughed. I wouldn’t be competing even if I wasn’t injured – I haven’t learned to spar almost at all, and I’m kind of like a T-Rex: teeny tiny arms, and unlikely to cause any damage unless I’m allowed to bite.

ImageBy the way, I seriously have one of those grabber sticks. I got it from Toys R Us, and it’s so ridiculously fucking useful, because now I can reach stuff! I wish I could take it everywhere with me, but unfortunately, I think people would mock me even more than they do now. I sometimes wonder if other people stare up at something they can’t reach while contemplating asking for help, and thinking I wish I had my grabber stick. And everyone seems to think it’s cool to make fun of you for it, because, you know, it’s not like being taken seriously or respected was high on your priority list, right? Plus, I’m a lady, so people (my older, somewhat misogynistic brokers) just sort of expect that I’m just working until I get pregnant. THAT pisses me off, because the amount of responsibility I can handle is to have a snake. You know why I have a snake? Because I can leave the snake completely alone for at least a week at a time. He’s like a plant that has to be watered once a week, fed once a month or so, and occasionally played with. (I play with him more than that, but he doesn’t NEED attention like dogs or children.) Sometimes I watch him try to climb stuff and then fall over in his tank. He doesn’t NEED me to be there for him. I can’t fathom why people want dogs – you have to feed them every day, walk them, pick up their shit, play with them, feed them AGAIN and groom them! Ugh. Plus, they bark and bite and fart and puke, and why do people want these things? They’re like furry obligation. So, imagine my reaction to people assuming that I want to have a kid right now. I mean, yeah maybe kids someday, but not right NOW. I’m too busy actually enjoying my life to saddle myself with a parasite for the rest of my life.

ImageI am sorry for the lazy post. It’s 4:30 in the morning, and I can’t remember what else I wanted to write about. I keep getting great ideas but I get them when I’m busy and can’t write it down, so then by the time I can, I can’t remember what the fuck it was. Oh yeah, Fan Expo is this weekend. I came up with a great costume idea but it was far too late to start making it. Maybe for Halloween…

 

And on that note, I’m going to bed. Later, bitches.

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